worth a read, from [www.oblomovka.com]

Me: In the Autumn, you take one of these horse chestnuts, drill a hole in it, put a piece of string through the hole, and play conkers. You flick the chestnut at the other persons’ chestnut. The chestnut that doesn’t break into pieces wins, and goes on to battle other chestnuts. Conkers! You want to play conkers, Ada?

Q: So, here’s the thing, Danny. We have Nintendo here. Nintendo and automatic weapons.

Right, so I am taking two old shoelaces into work (I knew they would be useful for something) and stopping off at the local conker tree en-route…