personal time

Well, it’s coming up – about a month away and I am torn; I don’t know how to describe the sensation, but I don’t really care about “the big 4.0.” and all that jazz, but I also care enough about not caring about it that… I dunno, it’s kind of a nuisance.

For my 30th birthday, I climbed Hergest Ridge. I drove all the way from Oxford to the Welsh borders and went up the hill which I had been past at least once prettymuch every year of my life from age 10, moreso when I was working in Aberystwyth.

It’s one of those landmarks which just screams “climb me, seek me, investigate me” and I finally gave in to the temptation, to give myself some “me” time in a place I’d never been before.

It was wonderful – green, spiky, with cold, wet, wild, biting air. The sort of place I love to explore.

In the evening I got home – Bob and Josie were due to come over for a small dinner down the pub, and I knew immediately that something was wrong when they walked through the door and Josie failed to immediately press into my hands a birthday card from JD (aka: Chris).

In that instant it was clear after all that this meant Chris had not given them a card – an inconceivable notion, he’s just too nice and too organised – and therefore I would be getting one from him later… and therefore something was scheduled for later, and therefore the plans for the evening were a fabrication; it turned out to be a 10..12 person dinner in the pub, not too big, not too embarrassing, and after the hassle of the preceding year it was rather nice.

I welcomed it, it was good to see everyone; but in general, like most security geeks, I am (a) a bit paranoid and (b) uncomfy with being in the spotlight for inexplicable reasons at a party. I still don’t understand parties – other than dinner parties – because generally I’d much rather be in the kitchen doing the washing up and chatting to people.

But this is 2008, not 1998. Things are different, now. Frankly I consider July 6th to be a much more interesting date than April 22nd, and I remember most clearly the amazement of learning what real friends will do for you in need; and I remember the pain, horror, torture and (worst) incapability – the fear that I may have seen a flash-forward of what my life might be like in another 50 years time – and for that enormous insight I’ve paid with a slightly clicky knee, and a tendency towards stiff back muscles.

So that’s why I don’t want to have a 40th birthday party next month.

I’m not going to be 40 in April. I’m going to be 2 in July.

Comments

7 responses to “personal time”

  1. How about celebrating being 0x28 instead with a quiet night in with a bottle of nice (preferably equal aged) single malt whisky and a good friend ?

    As for the 30th, well, OK, I’ll accept the nice, but organised ? Me ? 🙂

    I hope you have a happy birthday however you choose to spend it mate..

  2. You will wake up on the day and wonder what all the fuss was about and get on with life as normal, just a day older that what you were the day before…. just with less hair 🙂

    Happy 39 and 11 months !

  3. You’re a titch older than me, so my big 4-0 isn’t looming quite so much… and of course, being small and female, everyone always assumes I’m twitchy about the vanity aspect, rather than the “now what?” consideration. I spent my 30th diving off the Channel Islands in So. Cal., and I’m thinking that for 40, I’d like to have a quick sail around the Farallons.

    Course that means I then have to spend the next 10 years getting the heck out of here, cause I will have run out of largish islands off California to use as markers… maybe for 50 we’ll circumnavigate the British Isles or something… =)

    And I’m right there with you on significant dates. July 17 and May 31 are much much much bigger days than my own birthday. But that’s what living life does for you; I’d like to think that by 60 or so, I will have accumulated a host of days worth feasting and toasting and celebrating and remembering. It’s a worthy goal.

  4. Wences Michel

    Almost 40? They say the older you get the wiser you get? Maybe?

    When your 40 years minus 1 month your almost a man, well, my mother believed that you are child until you are 40.

    So, Cheers! Hip, Hip, hooray! To my friend Alec, I wish you a happy 40th next month and that you celebrate your birthday doing whatever the hell makes Alec happy! Be that climbing a mountain or charging a castle! Just remember to stay young at heart, to learn from the past, to prepare for the future and to live for the day! Salute! 🙂

  5. Hi Alec!

    Just turned 13 AA* myself, so I know exactly what you mean.

    Originally planned for my 40th BA**, I still haven’t done the 3-peak challenge. Maybe when I am 14 AA*…

    A while ago, I decided that I won’t be 40 BA** until I reach the peak of Nevis, and then will age rapidly through the rest of the hours to my currant BA** age.

    -Susan

    *AA-after accident age
    **BA -before accident age

  6. I dunno – to me, it just sounds like an excuse to have two parties! But I love parties. For my mom, she likes to celebrate her “birthday” in the number of years since she’s been cancer free, so I can understand that feeling.

  7. Take from life, the best that it gives you.

    I reckon the best birthday I’ve had so far, was my 36th, last year. I had a huge number of friends from around the world, who were able to come and have a lovely dinner with me. They did, we had a fine dinner and drank Margueritas all night, and even the restaurant staff wished me “happy birthday” (in Spanish).

    (Seriously snogging Cythia is another story…)

    Anyway, there will be multiple parties, and I’ll be at most of them :-).

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